Its finals week. Ive been studying. As a matter of fact its reading day: a day set aside with no classes where you can study your ass off. I acually have a final today because Barack Obama is coming down but that a different story. I wanna have a little discussion about personal responsibility.

About fifty percent of college freshman drop out. And its not always because they have a legit reason. (Lost my job, parent/relative died, no money, injury blah blah blah.) Sometime its simply because they are too damn lazy to go to class, do their homework, and basically act like they have a brain in their head. Sometimes its because they completely lose sight of who they are in their quest to fit in in college. We have all met people like this. You may even be one of these people, GF. Lets go over a few of them, shall we?

The Blameless
     This person refuses to take responsibility for anything. Its their jobs fault (didnt you tell then you couldnt work during class time?) or their friends fault, or they just had to go to that party/club/kickback and get totally wasted. My favorite is that its the professors fault. They made the tests too hard or gave you too much homework or didnt let you turn in projects late. You know what? I mess up too, I get bad grades on tests and forget homework and all that good stuff. When the prof. asks where it is I say i dont have it, and do better the next time.Its not that hard. You dont have to go to a party if you have an exam the next day and if you do go to that party and subsequently fail the exam, dont be suprised. 

The Victim
     Too much stuff goes on in this persons life and when it all piles up they cry "woe is me" and either give up or drink themselves into oblivion. Fantastic. Then they feel the indescribible need to let everybody know exactly how bad they feel and why and how nobody cares. Regardless of the fact that, on a college campus, probably about half the other students are going through the same issues. Unless it is something really bad and pretty legit, quit whining. "My boyfriend dumped me" isnt a legit excuse. I know this.

The Bum
     This person is simply too lazy to go to class, regardless of how late it is or how easy it is. They just lay around and watch tv and annoy the other more studious people around them by not showering enough or not cleaning up after themselves or some combo of the two.They also like to drag others down with them. Nobody likes to bum out alone. They then wonder at the end of the semester, why they have been put on acedemic probation. Dumb as Fuck.

"THAT Girl/Guy"
     Mmmmm...the things I could say about "THAT person." This is the person that parties so redonculously hard they are too hungover to do anything but worship the toilet the next morning. They go to parties, get WASTED, probably get drawn on, embarass themselves or some other unsavory event. And despite the terrible outcome of these events, they do the same thing every friggin weekend. No self control.

The Druggie/ Alcoholic
     There are two kinds of druggie. The one who takes uppers to get through their classes (except caffine) and ends up in friggin rehab to kick their habit, and the one who takes downers and forgets to go to class. Alcoholics have to drink to get through their day. They get up, they drink. Between classes they drink. While they study they drink. Before bed they drink. Seriously, if you know this person, get them help. No kidding.

The FNG
     The Fucking New Guy/Girl. They feel an isatiable need to prove themselves to eveybody so they try it all. Drugs, yup. Alcohol, sure. Run naked with googly goggles on? Yup. They want to fit in and thats okay. But they also let anybody and everybody take advantace of their stupidity. Even if it means giving up things they believe in or doing things against their better judgement. Their eagerness can also be annoying.

Bottom line is that people come to college and they cant handle/arent ready for what goes on in the real world. People use people. People fuck up their lives. It isnt all sunshine and ponies. Some deal by journaling or talking to friends or whatever. Others become the people listed above. Sometimes theres nothing you can do. But try to help them discover where the path they're going down is headed. If they dont listen, try to stan by them and help pick up the pieces at the end.

Okay, admittedly, I love clothes. But sometimes I see girls here on campus and I'm thinking, "who told her that looked cute?" Girls walk around looking like scene skanks and its just sad to see. So here is my rant on fashion sense.

1. Make your own style. And i dont mean shop exclusively at stores like Hot Topic and call it "your unique style". If you shop exclusively at only like, two stores, its not your style. Its the style the people who run the store make available to you. Not that its a crime to shot at HT, I love it there and get alot of accssories and long socks there(mmmm, they sell the BEST long socks). But I wouldnt call it a unique style. Always shop around to different stores and pick out what you like, not just what Cosmo says is in right now. I mean, if something is really in right now and you genuinely like it (wide leg jeans, plaid shirts, 3-button vests...mmmm) then go for it, but also understand that not every fashion is fit for every body type. And leggings ar NOT pants.

2. Dont put too much emphasis on brands. With the exception of black pumps and suits, dont buy things just because  they are a certain brand. If you can find a similar style cheaper, then go with that. And dont throw around that "the more you pay the longer it'll last" crap. Thats not always true and you may fing that those $20 jeans last longer than the $350 ones. You dont need designer everything, trust me. I get compliments on clothes I paid $10 for and have had for years. And besides, if it fits right and looks good on you, it'll look designer...kinda.

3. Staples. Black Pumps match everything. A nice suit that fits well. Black and brown boots. Racerback or spaghetti strap tanktops in many different colors. Jeans. A Little Black Dress. A black coat. A leather belt. A sundress. Keep them. They dont really go out of fashion.

4. Buy cheap, versitile accessories. Dont buy assessories (or clothes) that dont match anything you own unless it is absolutely the most amazing thing you have ever seen. Scarves are really cute and versitile. wear them as a head scarf, around you neck, around your waist, whutever. Buy necklaces that are sturdy and fixable (not HT, Claires, Icing crap. it breaks sooooo easily). DIY is a great way to make bland accessories look really nice. Take a regular plastic headband, wrap it in some cute fabric, and hot glue the inside down. Embellish as needed. Make your accessories uniquely yours.

5. dont get too caught up in fads. Dont wear fashions and spend crazy amounts of money on things that arent worth it. Dont buy pre-ripped jeans. EVER. Nine times out of ten you are paying extra money for a "distressed"
look that wont last two years without the holes getting bigger. Cripes, I hate ripping my jeans and I do it legitimately. If you absolutely crave the distressed look, buy regular jeans and go crazy on them with some sandpaper. Leggings ARE NOT PANTS! Nobody looks good in leggings. They are workout gear or something you wear under a shirtdress. Nobody wants to see your butt in spandex. Uggs suck. I dont care how comfortable they are, they are an extreme faux pas. If you live somewhere where it snows and its winter, you are permitted to wear Uggs. They are not to be paired with shorts, skirts, fuckin leggins, capris, board shorts or any other warm-weather gear. And dont give me that "they were made for Aussie surfers" crap. If you dont surf and you arent Aussie, it better be really cold when you wear Uggs. The Kanye West "middle eastern" scarf thing has got to go. Man, thats bad. Crocs are permissable for nurses and soccer moms and toddlers only. I think thats it.

6. I got this tip from another Xangan. if you wear revealing tops, pair it with a modest bottom. And vice versa. It'll keep you looking sexyt without looking skanky. Speaking of skanky, cute clothes do not make you presentable if you are wasted, high, or spent the last night sleeping on someones floor drunk and high. You just look like a skank in nice clothes.

7. Learn to walk in heels before you decide to take them out on the town. The higher the heel, the more practice you're gonna need.

8. Remember. Confidence looks better on you than anything. Everybody says it cuz its so true.

Wooo! So, I know I havent written in ages, *cough* not that anybody noticed *cough*. Between school and some recent developments in my life ive been remiss in my Xanga duties. Thats not what this post is about but i thought you all should kno.

So, I seem to have found myself a boyfriend. We met at a party about a week after school started back up. I had kinda had my eye on him the whole night and we were talking and...ok im about to make this sond a little skanky. Let me elaborate. My friend Mike had a friend who had just moved into a new place and she invited us to a party she was having. The first night was fun but nothing much happened. I did watch the girls make out though, which was awesome. Anyways,  the next night we went back to the party and there were new peole there. I was introducing myself when Tyler (yes, my beau :D) introduced himself to me. He called me meth by accident. The sad thing is I'm used to it. But I digress. I was watching, actually we were all watching the girls at the party make out when Mike was like, "why dont you jump in?" I had intended to later in the night but now that I had everyones attention I couldnt dissappoint. So....anyways. Later in the night I was sitting on the couch between Tyler and Adam ( a kid i had met the previous night) and we were talking about making out. Me, and my silly tipsy self, mentioned that, due to my not-so-great experiences last semester, had made the decision to make out with someone that night, which I had. Then Tyler just straight up asked, "wanna make out?"

Okay, I know it sounds bad. (I did say yes obv.) But I was tipsy, he was tipsy, making out is fun. And we didnt just go at it like hungry animals. One of the uber-drunk guys decided to come out of the bathroom and sit on the couch with us, looking like he was gonna blow chunks at any minute. I snuggled up next to Tyler to avoid being the target of such chunks. After the guy left, we just stayed like that. He put his arm around me and we talked quietly and he pulled my legs across his lap. It was actually really nice. I dont get to cuddle often, or i didnt then. But we did eventually start making out, at one point we even got the couch to ourselves. I got beard burn for the first time. But while we were laying on the couch it was like we both realized that while we had started out just making out, it had become alot more.....er.....intimate probably isnt the word I wanna use but whutevs. We would be kissing and he would just stop and look down at me like, "wow" and I was like thank you god. So later in the night, we exchanged numbers.

It took a long hard nine days for us to finally see each other. I had been calling him and he'd either be busy or have no way to get to me blah blah blah. But the next monday he called and invited me and Mike to come bowling with him and a friend. We were late, naturally. I was a little frustrated at that. But when I saw Tyler, I hugged him. Now if you know me (which, you dont) you know Im not really touchy feely. Making out at a party was SO  outside my normal behavior, hugging someone wasnt really normal either. On a side note, Tyler bowls very well. Anyway, later we went back to the dorms to drink and playcard games and watch movies. The guys got pretty wasted but Im really picky about alcohol so (i know i shouldnt be drinking, stop.).... While we were watching Transformers, everyone was starting to pass out so Tyler and I elected to back to my room and get some sleep.

I dont let guys Ive just met sleep in my room, usually. And at first it was awk because I wouldnt let him sleep in my bed with a) jeans on and b) shoes on. So he shucked his pants and shoes and I was in my pjs. (mmm high school gym shorts, how i love thee) We got to talking and he told me that he thought I was sexy and that he'd never met anyone like me and although my bs meter was going off, I did like it. For the record, he meant all of it. I mentioned that my ex and I had never done anything below the waist and he said, "so I'm guessing you're a virgin?" I hadnt wanted to tell him since my escapades with Evan and Jake had ended so badly. I kinda turned away and cursed at my bean spillage. But he was really cool about it.  He was like "its okay, its not a big deal." then he said something that hit my emmotional walls like a brick through glass. He said, "I know that thats a...pretty big deal for girls and, you know they want it to be special and...I just dont know if Im the special guy for the job." Just him saying that, told me how special he was. Not many guys would humble themselves in front of a girl they want. Especially if he thought it would get him dumped. I was touched by his honesty. Although, no matter how hard he tried, I didnt let him see my boobs, lol.

About a week later, he asked me to be his official gf. its only been abot three weeks but hes been so amazing and sweet to me. E ven if things dont work out between us, Im blessed to have met him. Hes refreshingly honest, just like that night in my bed. He just says what he feels, no embellishments. When he asked me out and I said yes he was like, "really?" then he smiled this big cheesy smile and said "youre my girlfriend." It was soo cute. Hes very intelligent, someimes he blows me away with his insight. He sings and writes his oun songs too. Hes patient. He understands that my virginity is important to me and although he will probably be the one to get it, he is very sweet and kind. And too well hung for us to just do it. So we're going a bit slow or a slow as our raging libidos will let us. Its just........fantastic. He makes me so happy. Im blessed to have him.